Press 1 for English

Just saw a Facebook group called "Why the HELL should I have to press 1 for English". I wanted to reply to the person who became a fan of this but I didn't want to insult the individual, who wouldn't have understood anyway, so I'm writing my response here.

Why? Because 1 represents the grand total of languages you can understand! You xenophobic cretin.

I don't mind stupid. I can hang with stupid all day. What I cannot abide is stupid and arrogant.